Is it ok to not be ok?

These last few weeks have been hard! Like seriously hard. Whilst I sit here reflecting on them I’m struggling to actually remember what was hard and why it was hard? Because that’s what happens life gets shit we ride it out put on our big girl pants and crack on! You get over it and it soon becomes a distant memory you managed to survive!

A wild 5yr old running around the supermarket hitting his siblings and acting completely bloody deranged whilst everyone looks on you with discarace, now that one I haven’t forgotten just yet!

Now whilst in the thick of it I wasn’t keen on being a mum at all and definitely questioned my life choices a lot, I mean I certainly didn’t pick the easy option. Anxiety at an all time high inside I felt like running but you can’t and it’s truly suffocating at times. I definitely said I was going for a wee so I could just have 5 minutes peace ALOT! Also questioned if I was in fact losing the plot because I was so bloody stressed out. Telling your husband that you might get sectioned if the kids don’t sort their shit out! I definitely had a glass of wine in my hand when he was walking through the door most days!

So that right there that pretty much summed up our half term it may seem harsh but it’s true and I’m not sugar-coating it because what’s he point?

The point is that we get through it and live to tell the tale, we create star charts, implement punishments, question our parenting. We question the children’s diet, question if they have behavioural problems you have missed (yes I did), arrange meeting’s at school and confide in friends. You pretty much do everything you can to get back on track and you do that because of love!

Because you care about your child and the person you want them to be, it kills me to see them being horrible to each other or putting each other down or even themselves down.

I have spoken to so many people in the past week who have expressed exactly the same feeling’s as me and it has made me feel so much better, not because their going through it too because it’s a shit place to be but because it means that I’m not on my own and I’m normal, it’s normal and sometimes it’s ok to not be ok!

We’re in this together and speaking about it is the best medicine.

I also recommend

– Deep breathing

– regular bathroom breaks

– Wine

– more wine

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